


A Moment of Light

by cordeliadelayne



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Christmas, First Kiss, Hogwarts, Light Angst, M/M, Marauders' Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-29
Updated: 2015-12-29
Packaged: 2018-05-10 02:29:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5565811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cordeliadelayne/pseuds/cordeliadelayne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lupin and Snape spend some time together at Christmas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Moment of Light

**Author's Note:**

> Written as a Christmas present for the lovely lore who gave the prompt “outside Hogwarts for some part of the holiday”.

Snape wasn't sulking. Sulking was for children and he was an adult now. He was an adult and capable of looking after himself. He didn't need a “responsible adult” to be waiting for him at home just so he could spend the holidays away from this wretched school. His N.E.W.T.s couldn't come fast enough.

He thumped the wall next to him and bit back the swear word that threatened to escape. He was cold and tired and miserable but he didn't want to go back to the Slytherin Common Room, where everyone else was packing their things for Christmas. Even the children with dead parents had found adults to take them all, so no Slytherin would be spending Christmas at Hogwarts this year. Except for him.

“Severus? What are you doing here?”

Snape closed his eyes in frustration. Of all the people he didn't want to meet.

“Severus?” Lupin asked again. “Are you all right?”

Snape kept his eyes closed. Perhaps this was all a terrible, terrible dream and Dumbledore had really given him permission to spend Christmas outside of the Castle.

“Severus?” Lupin said and Snape willed him to go away. Instead he sat down next to Snape. The stairs up to the Divination Tower weren't particularly wide, so Snape found himself squished closer to Lupin than he wanted, or ever dared wish for.

“What?” Severus finally asked. It should have come out cold enough to flay skin, instead he just sounded tired.

“Can I do anything?” Lupin asked.

He pressed his shoulder into Snape's, a deliberate sharing of body heat, and Snape fought not to sink into it. He would end the year as he had started it, pining for what he could not have.

“I'm perfectly fine,” Snape said.

“No you're not,” Lupin said, continuing before Snape could reply, “but that's all right. I'm not feeling very festive either.” He paused, but as Snape made no move to ask, despite his curiosity, Lupin carried on. “Sirius is staying with James for the holidays, but James grandparents and uncles are coming and they haven't got room for me any more. I said it was fine but Lily can't put me up and my parents have already gone on a trip to France and I didn't want them to worry when my plans fell through so I suppose I'm going to be spending the holidays here. What about you?”

Snape blinked. Even for Lupin's normal rambling this was bordering on the excessive.

“I'm spending Christmas here,” Snape said, once he'd realised that there had been a question involved.

“Really?” Lupin asked, softer than all his other questions. Snape refused to acknowledge the way that Lupin's happy smile made his heart flip.

“Yes,” Snape said. He'd wanted to add more, about how no one at home wanted to see him, but he swallowed the words; Slytherin's shouldn’t give Gryffindor's ammunition.

“Perhaps...perhaps we could go to Hogsmeade together?”

Snape stared at Lupin, really stared until Lupin shifted uncomfortably, but he didn't blink or turn away.

“Why?”

“Because I want to spend time with you.”

“Why?”

Lupin sighed. “Why do you always have to make things difficult, Severus?” He stood up and started walking down the stairs. “1 o'clock by the front entrance. I'll wait twenty minutes.”

Snape didn't respond, one way or the other, and Lupin didn’t slow down, just kept on walking.

* * * * *

At precisely 1pm Snape found himself staring out at Lupin from behind a pillar. He'd expected Lupin to have been gone by now but, true to his word, the werewolf was waiting exactly where he'd said he would be.

Snape wasn't sure whether to be pleased or disappointed.

His relationship with Lupin hadn't always been strained. Before The Incident Lupin had proved himself not completely insufferable and they'd even enjoyed some interesting conversations in the library. It was there that Severus had realised he felt a certain, fondness, for the other boy which was not completely unpleasant. Nor was it entirely welcome.

The minutes ticked by and Snape kept up his watch. He certainly didn't _have_ to go and join Lupin. He had made no promises. His word would not be broken. But...

...but he really wanted to. Which was a worse reason than any other he could come up with.

At exactly 1.15pm he moved out of the shadows and strode towards Lupin.

“Very well,” he said. “I will allow you to accompany me to Hogsmeade.”

“Very generous of you,” Lupin responded. Snape ignored the sarcasm and started walking towards the village. Lupin followed.

* * * * *

The walk wasn't entirely unpleasant. In fact it was very pleasant, and Snape found himself relaxing in Lupin's presence, despite repeatedly telling himself that he should do no such thing.

The ground was covered with snow, so they were taking their time, following the path carefully and occasionally bumping shoulders as they walked. The first time it happened Snape's whole body had twitched, but on repeat closeness Snape found himself leaning towards the heat that Lupin's body provided. At such moments he looked anywhere but at Lupin, unsure what exactly he was hoping he would find if he did.

Their conversation stayed on strictly neutral topics. Their homework, the teachers, the food planned for Christmas Day. They spent some time discussing some proposed new rules to Quidditch and found themselves in agreement that they should not be implemented. They talked about some rare creatures allegedly found in the mountains of Switzerland and Snape relaxed enough to actually laugh at one of Lupin's better jokes.

It was the nicest walk Snape had ever been on.

* * * * *

They found a sheltered seat in Madam Rosmerta's where they had a full line of sight to the entrance but no one was near enough to pay any attention to their conversation.

“Thank you,” Lupin said, as Snape bought them both a drink. “Not just for the drink,” he added. “Thank you for coming with me.”

Snape had never known what to do in the face of Gryffindor sincerity, and now was no different. He merely made a sound in the back of his throat which he hoped conveyed his meaning and sat down.

“Thank you for not asking, as well,” Lupin said after taking a sip of his drink. He motioned towards the fresh scars on his neck.

“What makes you think I'd be interested enough to ask?” Snape replied. The fact that he had considered asking, but then decided that he didn't want to force Lupin away was besides the point.

Lupin smiled, but it was the smile that Snape hated most to see, the one where the light in his eyes was dimmed. “Well, thank you.”

“You're penchant for saying thank you is almost as annoying as your habit of continually apologising for what is beyond your control.”

“Better than never apologising for anything,” Lupin suggested lightly.

Snape glared at him. “Is that Gryffindor's new motto?”

“Not Gryffindor's, no.”

They stared at each other a moment and Snape was surprised to find himself turning away first. He really didn't want to argue with Lupin.

“I'm...”

“Do not say you're sorry,” Snape interrupted.

Lupin chuckled. “I won't if you won't.”

Snape sighed. “Do all Gryffindor's get taught how to be insufferable, or are you exceptionally gifted in the practice?”

Lupin took a long drink. “Merry Christmas,” he said by way of an answer.

“Merry Christmas,” Snape replied with a sigh. He supposed giving in to the inevitable was the best way of dealing with a Gryffindor, especially if that Gryffindor happened to be someone he really didn't want to antagonise if he could help it. It was a new feeling for him, and one he didn't want to analyse.

“Have you started on your potions homework yet?” Lupin asked, changing the subject.

“I have already finished it.”

“Of course you have,” Lupin replied. “Do you think you could help me with mine, then? There are a few things I don't understand.”

Snape raised an eyebrow, not sure if Lupin was telling the truth or merely trying to distract him. But he never let an opportunity to talk about his favourite subject pass if he could help it, so he carefully expounded on their latest potions homework and was pleasantly surprised as Lupin interrupted with pertinent questions.

Before he knew it the sky was darkening and it was time for them to head back to Hogwarts and the evening meal.

They trudged back to the castle in a light blizzard, the snow falling even harder than it had been earlier in the day. This time Snape didn't hesitate in pressing himself close to Lupin as they rounded a corner, and they remained pressed to each other's sides as they walked until they neared the entrance. At which point they both stopped, as if by pre-arranged agreement.

“I suppose this is where we say goodbye,” Snape said. He was already pulling himself back into the Slytherin everyone expected to see.

“I wish you wouldn’t do that,” Lupin said, raising a tentative hand to brush away the sneer around Snape's eyes. Snape blinked in surprise. “If you could see what you look like when you're relaxed...”

“You have no idea what I have to put up with,” Snape said, stepping away from Lupin, even though he was nearly overcome with the desire to press himself even closer.

“ _Severus,”_ Lupin said, but then stopped, as if words weren't enough. Instead he stepped completely into Severus' personal space and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. Snape was too flabbergasted to think of a response. “Sit with me at dinner?” Lupin asked.

Snape blinked rapidly a few times before Lupin's words began to sink in. “I don't think...”

“There's hardly anyone still in the castle. No one will care.”

Snape found that very hard to believe. There would be people who cared very much that he ate in the Great Hall with a Gryffindor. But looking at Lupin's face, so eager and so stupidly brave, Snape supposed he could be no less.

“Very well, I suppose that will be acceptable.”

Lupin's startled smile was worth any future discomfort. As was the second kiss that Lupin foisted upon him, and which he found himself returning, a press of lips that sent his heart racing and made the darkness he could sense in the future begin to recede, just a little.

No one could take this moment away from them. And that was a memory Snape promised himself he would always protect, no matter what decisions he would have to make once the school year ended.


End file.
